Subconsciously Me

My two year old likes to joke around and be, what to her is, funny. So she decided to call my best friend, whom is a female, daddy. It’s happened before and the kids go in spurts when they change peoples’ names or call me by my first name, etc. Calling my friend daddy was hysterical to my two year old. She had some issues with what pronoun to use  but still called my friend daddy. Peyton did not think any of this was funny at all.

The anthropologist in me found this fascinating. I asked Peyton if he wanted to call my friend daddy as well. Peyton very seriously replied “no”. I thought that was pretty interesting because he knows that he has female parts but identifies as a boy. And yes, I know that it’s not that simple. In my head it seemed okay to call my friend daddy because pretend play is part of learning. Not that she is anything more then a friend, but why is it okay to call Peyton a boy when he was born female but not okay to call my friend daddy because she identifies as female.

Peyton was very observant of the two toddlers playing this game in the house. My friend’s son was fine with playing and still called his mom, mom. Peyton continued to call her by her first name. He knows that my friend is female and identifies as female and therefore she should be called something sounding female-ish. Whereas in the beginning of all of this, Peyton was so confused by pronouns and genders, all of this is now straightened out in his head. People question whether or not Peyton will remain a transgender person, and then these little things come up that in my head cement the fact that he will indeed remain a boy. At four years old, he knows with one hundred percent certainty that he is in fact male. Mind-boggling isn’t that? To be so secure in your gender at such a young age when you do not have the matching parts.



2 thoughts on “Subconsciously Me

  1. Very Interesting. I agree that Peyton not only knows what gender he identifies with, but who other people close to him identify as. I believe you are right in your assessment that Peyton will forever identify himself as a boy, whether society allows him to or not.


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